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I’m between theologies, but I still hate Cingular.

1) Cingular continues to suck. I called my caveman lawyer today. He said: “I may be from another era, when men battled glaciers and mastadons. Your “cars” scare me. When I ride in a jet, I sometimes get scared, thinking that I’m in the belly of a beast. But I do know that my client, Kurt, is entitled to at least 2.1 million dollars in compensatory damages.” I tried to calm him down and tell him that I just want a few simple condolences. He told me to aim higher. ah…caveman greed. (Caveman Lawyer is a Saturday Night Live reference.)

2) “I’m between theologies.”
Why hasn’t everyone converted to Catholicism, or at least secular humanism?
Reading the history of the Presbyterian church grants me feelings: negative ones. I can feel satan…probably in the same way that protestants can feel satan when they think on Catholicism. hmm….

This entry was posted on Friday, July 28th, 2006 at 12:29 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

2 Responses to “I’m between theologies, but I still hate Cingular.”

  1. Hans Gerwitz Says:
    July 28th, 2006 at 9:40 am

    As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

    - Is Hell Exothermic?

  2. Reese Says:
    August 8th, 2006 at 5:47 pm

    Kurt - the faith and mysticism of Catholicism makes it so opposed to the principles of secular humanism that the question turns in on itself with no answer possible.
    Hans - I adhere to the peacefull loving parts of all religions - does that mean my soul will be the only one in heaven ( and therefore I am God) ?

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